Archive for April 6th, 2013

Saturday, 6 April 2013

The Ballad of Lydia Pinkham by Traditional

Let us sing (let us sing) of Lydia Pinkham
The benefactress of the human race.
She invented a vegetable compound,
And now all papers print her face,

O, Mrs Brown could do no housework,
O, Mrs Brown could do no housework,
She took three bottles of Lydia’s compound,
And now there’s nothing she will shirk (she will shirk),

Mrs Jones she had no children,
And she loved them very dear.
So she took three bottles of Pinkham’s
Now she has twins every year.

Lottie Smyth ne’er had a lover,
Blotchy pimples caused her plight;
But she took nine bottles of Pinkham’s–
Sweethearts swarm about her each night.

Oh Mrs Murphy (Oh Mrs Murphy)
Was perturbed because she couldn’t seem to pee
Till she took some of Lydia’s compound
And now they run a pipeline to the sea!

And Peter Whelan (Peter Whelan)
He was sad because he only had one nut
Till he took some of Lydia’s compound
And now they grow in clusters ’round his butt.

From: http://www.in-gender.com/Gender-Selection/Lydia-Pinkham/LydiaPinkham_Story.aspx

Date: c1890

By: Traditional